10 Tips on How to Make Me Think You're a Loser
- Wear a fcuk t-shirt
- Wear a t-shirt which is intended to be a cop out of fcuk t-shirts but does such a poor job of it that it ends up being just as bad as an actual fcuk t-shirt
- [for women] Start talking about your slutty sexual exploits as if finding a man desperate enough to enjoy fornicating with you or looking at your exposed breasts is some kind of achievement worthy of gratuitously dropping into conversation
- Laugh at everything which incinuates something sexual as if the only prerequisite for good humour is that it somehow alludes to a filthy sexual act
- Act all confused whenever I start talking about Crazy Crosswords or Steele Jensen.
- Show off how ironic you can be by wearing a fashionable t-shirt which condemns fashion (such as the fcuk fashion t-shirt)
- Get a job as a bouncer at Birdie Num-Num's in Fortitude Valley
- Smoke in school uniform. In fact just be any high schooler who struts around like they're anything other than the dumb, worthless conformists that they generally are.
- Start an ambiguous touchy-feely relationship with someone because you're both too boring to actually say anything interesting to each other.
- Follow Manchester United, The Brisbane Broncos or the Brisbane Lions (I will let you off with a warning if you actually started following any of these teams before they became phenomenonally successful).
Good luck in your quest.
posted by Biggles @ 9:16 am
13 Comments:
Whats Crazy Crosswords?
I'm hoping that that was a joke. If it wasn't, please never come back here again - or at least do some research before you do.
11pm Weekdays on Briz31.
I agree completely, also add, people who seek fights at nightclubs, people who drive to close to other cars in the rain, and people who complain excessively at television advertising.
wait that makes it 13 .. the devils number
Who is Steele Jetson?
Get out!
Go the lions, you little beauty!!!
Hi Yuri,
have you noticed that Ned Martin seems to have got himself a girlfriend - the mysterious Bronwen. I can only imagine what goes on in those sections that you need authorisation to read.
cheers,
Redbeard
yes, i did notice about the mysterious Bronwen. Exciting stuff.
i noticed too, not that counts for anything....
btw hi commie :o)
Bidding on the password to read private entries starts at $5.
I've made the point before, but I'll make it again. Bronco's fans must be regarded as acceptable, and beyond any need for any serious warning - but only on three conditions.
a) That you started following them from the very start, prior to which you actually followed the Queensland cup.
b) That you continued supporting them in 1999, and even at the point where they needed to win 11 of 13 games to make the 8, insisted they were still able to win the premiership.
c) In the wake of the 2004 season you have not announced that you actually follow the Broncos and the Cowboys equally.
Regards.
Julian
i concur with Julian's statements. I had people like him in mind when I said 'I will let you off with a warning if you actually started following any of these teams before they became phenomenonally successful' - but clearly I didn't take it far enough.
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