5 Easy Steps to a More Interesting You
Bored? Depressed? Worried that everybody who comes in contact with you thinks that you're a depressing loser? Worried that life will never improve for you? Well, never fear - here are 5 quick and easy things you can do to achieve instant success in every area of your life.
- Refer to everything that you object to as 'the ---- that John West rejected'.
- Use the word 'sandwich' at every available opportunity.
- [for women] insist that you were once Velvet on Crazy Crosswords.
- [for men] insist that you once slept with Velvet from Crazy Crosswords
- Write an eight and a half minute long rock epic about subsistence farming
I've been doing a lot of thinking since I came up with this list and i've decided that it's flawless. In fact i've printed out 5,000 copies of the list and am now in the process of hiring homeless people to hand them out to people wearing fcuk t-shirts in Queen Street Mall. The revolution has begun...
posted by Biggles @ 5:24 pm
4 Comments:
I once slept with Velvet from Crazy Crosswords, the woman that John West rejected. Sandwich.
in your attempt to amuse me, you have actually insulted Velvet from Crazy Crosswords (reread your comment). This is not amusing and, frankly, makes me very angry.
Sorry Kosov-Kosov, didn't mean to anger you. I was simply following your advice, in a desperate attempt to make myself actually seem like an interesting person in this blog. However, your last post said that this does not amuse you. How is this possible? Perhaps a recall on those 5,000 copies of the list is necessary.
im not a funny person so ill sumise like this:
sandwich x 5000
:o)
Post a Comment
<< Home