Catching up with Myself

[ paraphrased for brevity ]

Interviewer: Hello.

Yuri: Hello, Yuri.

Interviewer: Tell us what you've been up to for the last few months or so?

Yuri: Ah, well you know me...

[audience laughter]

Interviewer: I sure do!

[hysterical audience laughter]

Interviewer: [laughing] Well, perhaps my question was too challenging - what have you done so far today, then?

Yuri: Oh, jesus; let me think... [grimaces]

[audience chuckling]

Yuri: I seem to remember going to IGA this morning.

Interviewer: Oh yes, and how did that go for you?

Yuri: Pretty good. I engaged in chit-chat with one of the girls at the counter, actually. It was the most exciting thing that's happened to me in about 5 months.

Interviewer: Was she attractive?

Yuri: No - but that's not really the point. It may as well have been a man, in fact. The point is that I successfully conversed with a complete stranger over a counter in a humourous fashion - I don't think i've ever done that before.

Interviewer: Shut the fuck up.

Yuri: You're a dick.

[station close]